Looking down upon myself

16 01 2009

I have absolutely no idea on how to self-actualize. I’m now a white piece of sheet, having nothing to be achieved. What am I going to do? I’ve got no absolute strengths.

It’s time to breakthrough – to get out of my comfort zone. This zone has been too comfort for me. Either writing, or dancing – every time I see people dancing in good posture, my heart aches. Part of me has lied under the water.

Hey unconscious, what should I do? I’m so unhappy for being lost. My ideal self is too ideal, too hard to achieve. Shall I try my best to work it out?

What I’m thinking of myself –
What I should have done: actively keeping in touch with my old friends in school, not being passive like right now. Be charming, hang an elegant smile on face, instead of giggling so loud out there. Be nice and beautiful. Good at dancing and posture, attractive figure. Good at analyzing politics, current affairs and actively writing poems, proses…

I’d like to be a writer, a language teacher, a journalist, a travel writer, a peacemaker, a translator, an editor, a latin dancer, a ballet dancer…






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